Let's be Honest...

June 9, 2011

I've received some comments lately saying that I seem to have this "Mommy thing down" and that I really know what I'm doing so for the sake of being honest let's go ahead nip those rumors in the bud!


Although, thank you to the kind people who left them :)

Yes, it's true that I am learning but sometimes it bothers me that mommy blogs always post the positive and leave out most of the negative.  Maybe some moms love every minute of mommyhood but to me it creates a false sense of motherhood and I'm guilty as well.  So far I've pretty much posted all the positive aspects of having a baby so today I'm going to get honest.

I've already posted the good so here's the bad and the ugly!

- For the first 3 weeks of Georgia's life she wanted to eat every 4 hours but now, who knows.  Sometimes it's every 4 or 3 or 2 and that drives me crazy.  I want consistency and she has no clue.

- Two nights ago she woke up at 2:15 and refused to go back to bed until 4:30!  To say I was a bit irritated is an understatement...plus, Jonathan was out of town so it was just me.  She would fall asleep and I would lay her down and she would scream.

- Speaking of laying her down and then screaming...this is new.  She's never had issues with sleeping on her own and then they just popped up a few days ago and she has become super clingy.  (any tips for solving this one people???)

- Sometimes she can soothe herself back to sleep and sometimes she can't and I have to.  I always wonder why sometimes she can and sometimes she can't...we don't do "cry it out here".  She's too little.

- Hearing her cry is like finger nails on a chalkboard to me.  I just can't stand it.  Usually she's hungry but our little one has some serious gas issues.  Although I know that if I can't get her to stop crying usually she can't go potty or really needs to burp (LOVE what gripe water has done in our lives!) but I still think...what if she's sick or has some medical issue I don't know about.  My mind just goes crazy!

- Middle of the night feedings to me are torture!  She still gets up once around 3 to eat and it is SO HARD to make myself get up.

- I don't like breastfeeding.  I refused to do it in front of people even when covered up...just not my thing so I was forced to be very isolated.  Total honesty...at some points I would cry from being so lonely.  LOVE feeding her from a bottle now.  I'm now free from my isolation but Jonathan can help feed her as well and I can leave her to go places!  I never wanted to breastfeed but society totally guilts you into doing it.

- On the same note I do pump (and supplement because I just don't make enough) and HATE it!  I feel like a dairy cow...nobody ever said I have to like it. 

- I tell Georgia every day, "every time I think I have you figured out you throw something new at me".  I assume this will continue for the next 18 years!  First it was that she hated being swaddled, then she hated sleeping on her back, then she was super hungry because I wasn't producing enough milk, then we discovered gripe water...it never ends really.

- Yes, you read that correctly.  Georgia doesn't sleep on her back!  GASP!!!  She is a tummy sleeper and I'm totally fine with that.  Both my niece and nephew sleep on their tummies and so did Jonathan and I when we were little.  We went from not napping AT ALL to full on 2 and 3 hour naps when we made the switch.  And no, I don't need to hear your negative comments on the issue...although you would be surprised how many babies are tummy sleepers.

So, how's that for "having the mommy thing down".  Not so much huh :)


His Girl said...

Now THAT is honesty. I'm a nanny for twin newborns, so I read a lot of mommy blogs to keep myself fresh, but no one cares to talk about the difficulties of sleep-training or indigestion. It's all "I love having her here!" (not that that's bad haha), but there's never any reality to it. Thanks for sharing!

P.S. Both twins started out as back sleepers and now can't sleep unless they're on their tummies! Sometimes people are just a leeeetle too paranoid. =)

MICHELE said...

I agree I am ALL about the honesty. Nothing gripes me more than hearing sunshine and roses from mommies when I KNOW it isn't. It does totally give first time prego mommas the false sense of what it is really like.
I think I remember reading your daughter was a meconium baby (she pooped before delivery and then they had to suction her). My daughter was too and I will tell you I seriously think that screws w/ their digestive system and track! Everyone one I have ever talked to experiences the same problem. I was in for a long road with that.

And just for the record both my kids were tummy sleepers. Who wants to sleep on their back? HA! Do what works is always my motto.

And I totally hear you on the bf thing. I hate it, and only do it b/c it is the most nutritional complete for them AND let's be honest b/c I am cheap and it is free. :)

Thanks for being real!

Britt said...

I LOVE the honesty!

In a way, its nice to hear stuff like this from other moms, yes? I know it is for me because I've had my fair share of these same thoughts with BOTH girls and to hear that it isn't all sunshines and rainbows in every other house, is refreshing! :)

Both of my girls: tummy sleepers, problems with breastfeeding, every day is different, attitudes are different, middle of the night feedings were terrible, and the unconsolable crying is enough to make you want to scream. So you have at least one mommy that is totally on the same page.

On the flip side, the older they get, the easier all of these things you mentioned get. Of course, you'll have new battles like temper tantrums and only wanting to eat cookies instead of a healthy meal (haha) but motherhood is basically a million different phases and you adjust to each one!

Hang in there, and honestly, you do have it figured out. Being a mom is fun AND hard AND rewarding. Plain and simple! You are doing great!

CMae said...

I was a tummy sleeper and I turned out just fine! ( so I think about my own self LOL)

And I was bottle fed but bec I was allergic to milk and could barely hold down soy milk!

Amber said...

My 9 week oldalso has issues with soothing herself to sleep. I'm afraid I don't have any tips since we're still working on it. Oh, and she HATES sleeping on her back as well. Sometimes she'll sleep on her side, but mostly her tummy. I don't care what people say either. I just don't tell her pediatrician so I can avoid a SIDS lecture.

Lyndsey said...

I think the more you worry and the more you stress, the better the mommy. It means you CARE enough about your child to want to try anything and everything to make them feel better. But it is HARD. It does get easier as they get older though so hang in there! I know getting up in the middle of the night was really hard for me too, but now I don't even remember what it was like - I think it's one of those things you forget so you're willing to do it again someday :)

Do what is best for your family and keep loving on that sweet girl!

And what is gripe water? I've never heard of it.

Jen said...

I <3 your honesty... Two things struck a chord with me:

- Hearing her cry is like finger nails on a chalkboard to me. I just can't stand it.

- Middle of the night feedings to me are torture! it is SO HARD to make myself get up.

These exactly! Hang in there, we'll get through it! (Right?! lol)

Jessica said...

Love your honesty! I can totally relate on several of those. Ava (literally) slept on my chest the first 3 weeks of her life because she wouldn't sleep for more than 15 minutes anywhere else.

I feel like you read my mind on breastfeeding (pressure from society to breastfeed, hating it in public, switching to pumping and not producing enough!!). Good luck with pumping!!

Anonymous said...

I can also relate to every single thing that you mentioned here. I went through the exact same emotions and tough times in my little girls first few weeks and months of life. I always felt so guilty because all I ever read about is how great being a mom is and how perfect everyone's lives are with their little babies...never posting about the hard stuff..never admitting that they crid tears of absolute frustration from time to time too. Thanks for being honest.

Melanie said...

Your so right! We do tend to focus on the positive side of 'mommyhood' and dont let in on the darker moments! We had the same problem with Makayla not wanting to go to sleep on her own but wanted to be held. Figured out I wasnt dressing her warmly enough..she loves to be as warm as a firecracker! Total opposite of me..I hate being overheated..lol! Oh and btw..I hear you on pumping..I dislike it as well..makes a woman feel just like a cow!

Shanna said...

My 1 month old is doing all of the same things. I guess it's good to know it's not just us, huh? And good for you for sticking to BFing as long as you have. I gave ups after a week.

Ryan V. said...

I don't have babies so I can't relate, but I wanted to say I so appreciate your honesty! I have stayed with my SIL and also my sister after they had their babies and I know for sure it isn't all rainbows the first several weeks! Hang in there! I know once you get her figured out, she will grow into something else or just simply change her mind! hehe Just do what works best for you and baby and you should be fine!

kendrasue said...

My little one would not latch on to save his life so for the first 6 weeks I would pump and then feed. I definitely felt like a cow because it would be one after the other. So I'm hoping with this one there will be no problems in that department because I would love to not stop breastfeeding after 6 weeks.

And as for the tummy sleeping...mine has slept on his tummy for the entirety of his 4 years. And he sleeps fine that way.

Callie Nicole said...

I don't think you ever REALLY have the mommy thing down! Thanks for being honest about your difficulties. It's so easy to feel alone when things don't go prefectly, so I think it's important to be up-front about this stuff!

Cecilly said...

I'm so glad you're supplementing. A mom in my class won't supplement her 11 month old! She's only drinking four ounces and she's sucking air when she's done with a bottle. She finally brought some cows milk, because she refused to use formula and she's usually so easy going.

Keep it up momma!

Lacey said...

If it's any consolation ... the first 2 or 3 weeks, babies seem to sleep through anything. THEN, they wake up and have issues getting themselves to sleep. Almost every mommy I know have had the same problem -- we think we have these fantastic little babies on routines, then they decide to join the world and the hard work starts. You will definitely get there and things will get a lot easier. xox


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