We don't like Smart Cars!

July 2, 2010

When I married Jonathan I knew I was marring someone who was obsessed with cars!  I, on the other hand don't really care that much about cars.  I'm usually about looks when it comes to cars and I hope this doesn't offend anyone but I think the Smart Car is one of the ugliest cars ever and once the hubs told me a few facts about the car I realized it is also the dumbest car on the road.

Here is my husbands "rant" on the Smart:

I guess before I get into my rant I need to lay down some background information about me and cars. Some guys like fishing, whittling, golf and other boring stuff. I like cars; I like smoky burnouts and the smell of motor oil. My favorite cars are functional. They make sense in layout and purpose and they do it all with confidence. For instance I like Ferraris because they are race cars that actually race. I like jeeps because they are SUVs that actually can go off road, and that’s what they were created for (see WW2). My favorite cars do what they are meant to do and they do it well. My least favorite cars do nothing well and the Smart is one of these cars.


I love and hate a lot of cars, but I hate the Smart car the most. Why? You ask. Well to answer this multifaceted question we must first explore the reasons why someone would buy a Smart. I can come up with four reasons:

1. Safe, small, practical, affordable (in other words a commuter car)

2. Technologically advanced (so they think)

3. Great fuel economy

4. Stylish

Reason 1 addressed:
The first reason is to me the only valid reason to buy a Smart. I understand that some people want a safe, small, practical, and affordable car. I think there is a nice little niche for people who want these sub-compact cars. There are a lot of cars to choose from in this class. If you want a car that is small practical and most important safe then don’t chose the Smart. Look at the video below for proof of why the Smart is not a very smart choice:

http://www.spike.com/video/crash-test-shows/3151924

The best choice for a small, SAFE, practical and fun car is either a Honda Fit, or a Mini Cooper.




Both of these cars are far more practical and far more fun than the Smart. Both cars are affordable (Fit-14,900, Mini-18,800). A Smart in base guise is very affordable, but also very basic. You want air conditioning, sorry, want automatic windows and locks, sorry, want a radio or a CD player, sorry, but you do get a coin holder (congratulations!). To get a smart with any of the options the other cars have standard you will pay about 14,000. The Fit and Mini also come with a backseat (now your baby won’t have to ride on the roof).

Reason 2 addressed:
First off, if you want a technologically advanced car you should be smart (ha!) enough to know the Smart is not advanced in any way. I’m not really sure where to begin here. There are a whole lot of things about the smart that make it a cave man on the technological front. All you lovely ladies (and men?) who read my wife’s blog need to know is that city cars are moving to electric power. Electric power is the “wave” of the future for city cars. The best of these new age cars will probably be the Nissan Leaf. So for all you tree hugging techno peeps there is a new automotive savior and you will actually be able to buy it pretty soon: http://www.nissanusa.com/leaf-electric-car/


Reason 3 addressed:
If you buy the Smart for great fuel economy know that you are getting ripped off…royally. The most comparable car to the Smart in terms of standard features, fuel economy, size, and safety is the Geo Metro. You know the egg shaped car of years past.  The Geo metro gets 44 MPG and the Smart only gets 41MPG!


The fuel economy  was great and you could get one in purple or turquoise. The smart while snazzy lacks those color choices and it lags in the MPG department as well. Oh yeah and used geo metros can be had for as little as 1,000 dollars on your local craigslist. What’s that? Worried about reliability well you could always buy two or three geo metros and when one breaks down you have a back up.

Reason 4 addressed:
Well if you are one of the cool kids out there that subscribes to Us Weakly (I know I misspelled that), and all you can think about is what stylish new “green” car the Hollywood types are driving do yourself a favor and buy a Prius. If you are interested in high style, a small car, and throwing away your money than wait a year or so and buy an Aston Martin Cygnet:


The smart does have one redeeming quality…it looks good with a lift:


I hope I thoroughly convinced all of you out there to not buy a Smart car. If you have any questions let my wife know, it will give me an excuse to talk cars. I hope I didn’t offend anyone and I hope you all enjoyed this rant as much as I did.

5 comments:

Laura said...

Let your husband know, that I found this extremely interesting as well as entertaining. Not that I was in the market for one of these as my 6'8" husband would laugh but it is interesting to hear someone refute the crap people try to sell you on these cars.

Megan said...

Jonathan writes some very entertaining things! I know Paul will like this one!! I agree, Smart cars, are not smart.

cait said...

love this! we call them "stupid cars" around here. my hubby's "thing" is cars too...he's crazy/obsessed and can tell you just about anything you need to know. I love how he pointed out the geo metro gets better gas mileage. so funny! My mom and I joke that we couldn't even go christmas shopping in one b/c there wouldn't be enough room for all our bags even though we're two petite people.

Anonymous said...

I find it interesting that those who hate the Smart car the most are those who do no town one or have ever driven one. In other words, they now absolutely nothing about them, but feel free to rag on them.
Ugly? That, my dear, is in the eye of the beholder.
Dangerous? No. A five start safety rating is something many larger cars do not have. Why do not people like yourself hate the Toyota Camry? It, too, has the same five star rating.
Your third rant has to do with your opinion of the owners of the Smart car. A personality judgment, nothing more.

Emily P. said...

Dear Anonymous,
1. My blog, so I can say what I want.
2. I never asked anyone to read it...that was your choice.
3. Don't call me "dear"
4. Proofread before you post something

Hi dear, this is Jonathan, Emily's husband. I wrote the post. So I'm going to set you straight because frankly I feel bad for you because it seems you were mislead.

One does not have to own something to know if they like it or not. I do own a Sherman Tank, but I know that I would not like driving that to work everyday. I obviously know more about the (not so) Smart car than you. Read the following article to see that the Smart does not have the 5 star (or top safety pick rating) you said it did. http://money.cnn.com/2008/05/14/autos/smart_fortwo_iihs_crash_test/index.htm Pay attention especially to the second paragraph. Where they say due to the Smart's small size it is not safe for highway driving. Excuse the pun, but the Smart just is not a car I'd be caught dead in.

Oh, and for the record. I am not especially fond of the Toyota Camry so I'm not really sure where your 2nd to last point was going.

So...here is some advice for you. Its obvious you care about the enviroment and want a car that gets great mileage. Here is an updated list of a few cars that are safer, more reliable, more practical, and get just as good mileage as the smart (within 1 mpg hwy): Chevy Cruze Eco, 2012 Ford Focus SFE, Ford Fiesta SFE,2011 Hyundai Elantra. So do yourself a favor and go trade in your smart car for one of aforementioned cars.

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